Coffee Shop People: Part I

I love coffee shop people. I spend my mornings and sometimes my afternoons in coffee shops, reading, writing, drawing, and mostly, talking to and observing other coffee lovers. The stage opens at 6am every morning and from there, people order their drink and take their spots on the coffee shop stage. Ahem.. I'm sorry, I mean "THEIR" spots. Here are my observations:

Electrical Outlet Man

There is the man who must sit next to the electrical outlet. I personally enjoy watching him open the doors to the stage and shoot his first glance over at "his" chair. He finds another spot if it is being occupied, and will sit in a position to closely keep an eye on "his" spot. Of course, its only "his" spot between the hours of 7:45am and roughly 10am. If he is late some days, I worry about him.

Bible Man

Bible man sits in upper terrace seating in this coffee shop. He sits right in the middle with his stack of handwritten notes on lined paper and markings all over his bible. He religiously takes the afternoon shift each and every day. A fine sifter, he sifts through every verse in the Bible and holds all religious people in his Faith responsible for sticking to the scripture and not inventing things in their sermons. This is what he does every day. He says hello and goodbye and all other cast members on the stage know him as "Bible Man" and think he is pretty "nice". He told me he thinks he is a "jerk". I disagree.

Quick Sketch Artist Dude

Quick Sketch Artist Dude sits in the upper terrace as well but at the first table closest to the bar. This is specifically so he can see each person that is standing in line in order to quickly sketch them. He has till the person is being helped to complete a sketch of their face. His shift begins around 7pm or so. I think its fun to mess with him. He does not know this though. So, I go to "wait" for my drink as soon as he is in the middle of sketching somebody else and quickly form a pose that suggests "I'm thinking of something really interesting that is far off in the distance" while waiting for my drink. He shifts his focus onto me and starts drawing me. I pretend I have no clue what's going on. Then I turn my body and face the other direction just as soon as he finishes the oval and one eye. I know, I'm mean.

The Jazz Man

Jazz man cruises in and cruises out many times a day. In fact, he mine as well set up a tent right outside because he pretty much lives there and visits with every single person who is seen in there as often as two times a week. He wears a straw hat and fist bumps random people. He has a kind heart, this is evident, but doesn't seem to understand "personal space". People have to scoot back when he talks to them. He can be seen at this coffee shop at any given time of the day.

Left side of the Couch dude

Left side of the couch dude is easy going and laid back, and reads politics on his ipad every day. His shift begins at 8am and usually lasts an hour. He kindly hosts any guests that want to share the couch with him, including 50 year old man who likes to tell "Pun" jokes. Left side of the couch dude and myself have agreed that if any coffee shop cast member is late to the stage or seated in an irregular spot, they shall be cited. I'm working on creating the citation tablet.

The list goes on and on.. I still have to write about the following characters:

Right side of couch woman Dancer

Spanish Sculptor Artist

Upper Terrace Community Blogger Paddleboarder Man

Old Woman and 3 Old Men High table

3:30 pm Old Man Fan Club

Owner of my favorite dog "to-go" person

Headphones and Screenwriter Dude

So I will finish my cast of characters later. I know what you are thinking.. "Dang, she must be in there all day to know everyone's shift." NO. I usually stay for an hour and half total. This hour and a half varies throughout the day depending on my work schedule. These observations are a year's worth and have been accurately cross-referenced with other coffee-shop observers.

The Elephant in the Room

The Elephant in the room story is about a bunch of guys that went into a dark room, each at the same time and felt an Elephant. Not knowing what they were feeling, they each left the room with an impression. Each person swore up and down that their experience was real. One man claimed that he was absolutely sure that what was in that room was a dull sword (the tusk), the other claimed he felt a rug in there. The story can be told many different ways, but in the end, everyone had a true authentic experience but all experiences were different. This is us. The room is the world, it is life. We all come from different places and know a certain truth, because we have experienced that truth at some point or another, from some angle. Some of us got way up close to it and were standing face to face with it without even knowing it while the rest of us might have only touched it at a slight angle. To impose our views on anyone else and claim that their truth is wrong is essentially claiming that our truth is wrong too because we experienced something different than they did. Language is the only platform to which we can really try to articulate these ambiguous thoughts and feelings that are within us. We can only share our stories with each other and try to pinpoint the same feelings and ideas that are shared but will NEVER be the other person to feel it how they did. The more we understand this concept, the harder it is to judge anyone for anything... The more we understand this concept, the wider our love expands, and the greater our quality of life becomes.. (of course, that just my own experience of the elephant in the room)

Opposing Words

In order to attain strength, we must brave fear. The word brave and fear need to come together to attain strength. These contrasts are found in almost everything we have ever done. Think back to the first time you spoke in public. In order to overcome stage fright and command presence, you needed to gain acceptance- of yourself. The main reason people have stage fright is because they think they will be booed off stage or be boring, sound stupid, or upset somebody. So in order to overcome fright, you needed to know more about yourself, gain acceptance, of yourself. So ultimately, in order to overcome fear, you must seek knowledge, in this case, its knowledge of yourself. Usually life is paralleled in opposing forces. According to Sir Isaac Newton, for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Could that not be also applied to concepts and themes in life? In order to understand hate, you have to understand love. In order to succeed, at some point you have to fail first. There are always outliers to these laws of course, but in general, its interesting how this works. In sticking with this theme, in order for a tree to GROW, it first has to shed it's leaves and DETERIORATE them back into the soil as rich nutrients. In order for people to grow, we have to shatter old layers to grow new ones.

Perhaps this is where that expression "No pain, No gain" comes from. So in the greater tapestry of life, our mishaps are preparations for the pendulum to swing back the other way. Isn't that life though? When we experience a really horrible tragedy, usually more unfold within the same timeframe (When it rains, it pours), because the pendulum is still swinging in one direction. It will eventually swing back if you allow it to. But if you keep nudging it, it may never swing back.

Mirror Mirror on the Wall, Why is Black Friday the blackest of them all?

So with Black Friday quickly approaching, I thought it might be helpful to run through some tips together to prepare for such a wallet welting day:

1. If you are starting to panic because you haven't spent anything and it's still Thanksgiving day, you need to read the next few really carefully.

2. The US is the most wasteful place on the planet and Orange County is the most wasteful place. We were perfectly fine a week ago. Why are we letting the advertisements mess with our heads. The world will still go on if we don't buy one more thing.

3. Black Friday is a symbol to companies that we give in to their marketing schemes. Let's not send that message.

4. If I could travel across South America for two months living off of one backpack while traveling through every climate imaginable, I'm quite sure its possible to make it a few more years on the things we already have. We hardly get mileage out of the stuff we have because we are so busy working to make enough money to have those things. (At least I am)

5. Black Friday is a plague. It spreads. If we resist buying something and tell others that we aren't going to,we can help heal this sickness.

6. IRONY: Thanksgiving is a day to be thankful for everything we already have. We just undo our thanks by going to buy "more stuff". Its like saying to a friend "Hey, thank you so very much for the ten sweaters you gave me. I am so thankful for them... but, I think I'm going to buy one more cause ten wasn't enough."

7. I like buying new things. We all do. It's exciting. But buying something used is also new to us. If you must buy something on Black Friday, go to a thrift store. Buy it used. The impact on the earth is softened.

8. Who got ready for Black Friday so that we could splurge? Was it some kid or elderly in a sweatshop? Probably.

9. Hey, if you must buy something, then do it. Nobody can judge you and I certainly won't. These are just things to think about so we can collectively move away from this habit.

Okay so what to do instead on Friday... Make it green.

1. Donate stuff you already have that you don't need anymore

2. Go hang out with some random homeless person. There is a small homeless colony in Santa Ana by the civic center. They love the company. You will leave feeling grateful, I promise.

3. Find things you don't want and make something new out of them and give them as gifts for the holidays.

4. Go hiking.

5. Go swimming.

6. Swimming might be too cold. Don't.

7. Only go swimming if you are wearing a wetsuit. Maybe 2.

8. Write letters to people you love.. Do you remember how awesome it felt to get handwritten letters in the mail?

9. Go commit a random act of kindness. ( I was in my favorite coffeehouse last week and went I tried paying for my drink, the lady informed me that somebody before me already payed as a random act of kindness and that I was to pass it on.. I have been brainstorming creative ways to do that. Perhaps it will be a later blog topic)

10. Plant native seeds in your yard. Contrary to popular belief that Spring time is the time to plant, November and December in California is actually the right time to plant, especially if you are planting Natives.. You will hardly have to water them since the rainy season is approaching.

11. Make some kind of food from scratch.. The more we make things with our own hands, the more we value them.

Human stuff

So this book I'm currently reading is called "What We Leave Behind".. Let me clarify.. very different than the book "Left Behind" although there may be similarities in the message of leaving unwanted things behind. Not sure. Okay that was sarcastic but its true. Anyways, What we leave behind is symbolic of our life path. For example, If I leave behind a garden, I am leaving behind something useful to others. If I leave an economic disaster behind, like what many so called leaders choose to do, then I am leaving a burden behind. So far, I just finished the chapter called "Waste". Well what is Waste exactly? Waste to one person or one being might be a livelihood to another. Derrick the author talks about pooping in his yard to return the nutrients back to the soil. He says that the soil and the decomposers need this to return to the earth. At first, its a bit disconcerting to read the details about a pooping episode (or many should I say). But once you push back your childish Kindergartner that hears the word poop and says "EWE!", its easy to see how this really does make sense. We eat plants, plants take in the nutrients, we poop out stuff and it doesn't go back to the plants, it gets incinerated and in some cases, it might get dehydrated at the waste treatment plant and sent back to use as farming. If it gets sent back to plants, it takes a rainfall to decompose it back into the ground and the plants will be happier because of it. Which brings me naturally to my next thought.. So we are everything on earth.. We are mineral, we are rock, we are plants, we are everything. Then how did we get so disconnected from the earth? According to this author, our trash in the last century has gone from 92 pounds of trash per person per year to 1,242 lbs of trash per person per year. Clearly there is something wrong with this picture. People in Orange County are responsible for creating the most amount of trash per person per day (11lbs). This is a little embarrassing. Why have we created more trash? Because we believe as a society that everything should be boxed and wrapped in a million things. The idea of something being "new" means its more valuable and the only way to make it look really new is to box it up and package it. Can you imagine if you went to go buy your ipod at an apple store and the dude handed you a brand new ipod and said "Open your hands" and then threw in the headphones and the charger right into your hands. You would have some thoughts as to whether it were new or not and if you were buying it as a gift, how could you prove to the person you were getting it for that you weren't being cheap and actually bought it new. This has something to do with it. I wonder how we will change our behavior. I am guilty of forgetting to bring my own canvas bags to the grocery store. I contribute to the waste as well. Maybe we just need to completely ban unnecessary packaging. Maybe if I turned up at a grocery store and forgot my canvas bag and the grocer told me that they weren't handing out any or even selling any plastic bags anymore, carrying things out to the car in loads, separately, just one time might teach me a lesson. Just as we know we have to take time to charge our cell phones or they will die, we also will just have to learn to take time to remember to bring our own shopping bags, or our earth will deteriorate.

Patients of Life

We are all patients of life… Somehow, we are all recovering, always recovering. Nobody is exempt from this... not even the people that "look" and "seem" happy. We are administered different treatments in varying dosages. Our medicine of the soul arouses in different forms, each trying to anoint us with a PH level that neutralizes us. When we forget to be grateful, we are administered the medicine of loss, in some form or another. We look at it as loss unless we understand that a nudging was needed… a tweaking perhaps here or there. For example, if a person loses their car and now has to learn how to make plans for transportation, they lose a physical object in order to gain a new found appreciation for what they already had, They also develop a new look or approach to problem-solving, having to venture out of their comfort zone. When they attain a car once again, they feel happy and content with what they have.. Is not the goal of all creatures to have their needs fulfilled? To be happy? So if we are already there, we are technically happy but we just don’t know it yet. In essence, our dosage of medicine is some catalyst of cleaning our eyes and renewing our outlook on life. If I think for 3 hours about how awful it is to not have any fingers and imagine all the time and struggle it would take for therapy to function in a world that is ideally set up for people who already have fingers, then I come away from those 3 hours of deep thought feeling extremely rich not having paid all that in time and money to be able to meet a basic need. Therefore, understanding how amazingly wealthy we are right of the beginning keeps us in the PH zone. There is a difference though between a PH zone and being neutral. Being neutral is not living. There is certainly a difference. Being alive is having extreme emotions, being extremely grateful, extremely annoyed, extremely happy and giddy.... these are all emotions and feeling all of these is what makes us human. The key is what we do with these feelings that we have and how we channel that extreme energy that these emotions gift us with, this is the art of living.